Villain

Why can’t I say what I want
In this world where deception rules
And fake smiles hold families together?
Why is it so hard
For me to be honest
When all my life I’ve lied?
In this world of lightly treading
Manipulation and untruths
Why is it that honesty
Solves my problems
But hurts everyone else?
Is that all I’m meant to do?
To cause pain and misery?
Why have I tried all my life
To disguise my emotions,
To protect people,
Only to find that
It hurts them all the same?
Perhaps I am selfish.
In protecting them,
I protected myself
I never wanted
to hurt anyone
So I took myself away
Living under a mask
Shrouded in lies
I fooled even myself
Into thinking I was the hero
Instead I am the siren;
I am the villain